Three Takeaways From Our May Retreat

We just wrapped up our May retreat in Costa Rica last week, and honestly, it was a special one.

We had an incredible group of men, including five returning guys who had already experienced The Balanced Man before. And you could feel the impact of that immediately. From the very first night, there was already a level of openness, trust, and leadership in the container that helped the newer guys settle in quickly.

What I appreciated most was that the returning men didn’t try to “teach” or “lead” in an ego-driven way. They simply embodied the experience. They dropped in quickly, stayed present, and naturally helped create an environment where the newer men felt supported and welcomed.

That energy shaped the entire week.

And while every retreat is different, there were three big personal takeaways for me from this one.

The first was alignment.

One of the questions we brought into the circle was: Where are you currently out of alignment in your life?

It’s a question we’ve explored before, but what’s interesting is that the answer changes depending on where you are in your life. Sometimes it’s health. Sometimes it’s work. Sometimes it’s relationships.

For me, this retreat made me realize there are a few relationships in my life where I haven’t fully expressed what needs to be said. Nothing major, but there are conversations that need to happen. Things that need to be cleared up. Even though everything may look “fine” on the surface, you can still feel when something is slightly out of alignment underneath it all. And it’s that misalignment that can cause undue tension in those areas of our lives.

That awareness became really clear for me this week.

The second takeaway was the importance of fully stepping into the experience.

One of the things I appreciate most about leading these retreats with Terry and Jeremy is that we’re not standing on the sidelines guiding men through an experience we’re not participating in ourselves. We’re in it too. We’re doing the breathwork, the boxing, the hikes, the circles, and the uncomfortable moments alongside everyone else.

For me personally, boxing and jiu-jitsu still push me outside of my comfort zone. I’ve grown a lot in both, and I feel far more comfortable now than when I first started, but there’s still that edge there. And honestly, I’ve come to really appreciate that feeling.

There’s something powerful about stepping into an environment that demands your presence. You can’t really fake your way through boxing or jiu-jitsu. You have to be there mentally and physically. And having someone like Terry and Jerry, who know how to push your edges while still making you feel safe and supported, creates an incredible environment for growth.

What I realized most during this retreat was how far I’ve come in those environments and how much I actually enjoy them. And not because I’m trying to become a cage fighter, but because those experiences continue to teach me something about myself every time I step into them.

The third takeaway was something simpler, but maybe the most important of all.

The reminder of how badly we all need a reset sometimes.

Even though we’re helping facilitate the retreat, it’s still an opportunity for me to step away from my normal routine and really drop in myself. To be in a different environment, around different energies, eating different foods, sleeping differently, spending more time in nature, and being fully present with a group of men doing the same thing.

It reminded me how important it is to take these pauses.

Not because something is wrong. Not because life is falling apart. But because sometimes you need space away from your normal patterns to reconnect with yourself again.

I think that’s one of the biggest reasons the returning men came back as well. Not necessarily because they needed to “fix” something, but because they understood the value of stepping out of their day-to-day lives long enough to reset and reconnect. To have the ability to watch the underlying programs that are running their lives and see them from a different perspective.

And honestly, I think we all need that from time to time, or we can get caught up in the game of life.

This retreat was a strong reminder of that for me.

So if you’ve been feeling the pull for your own reset, maybe there’s a reason for it. Maybe Costa Rica is calling. Maybe it’s simply time to step out of the noise for a moment and reconnect with yourself again.

We have two upcoming retreats:

• August 8–15, 2026
• October 17–24, 2026

If this resonates with you, reach out and let’s see if it’s the right fit.

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